Yeah, I am so that mom...

So I love this indoor playground place. It's air conditioned, has wi-fi, and couches. I sit my ass down and relax. The kids run amuck and have a great time. If they can't do something by themselves, then they shouldn't do it. I don't need to coddle them. Little Mr. J can already climb the gigantic inflatable slide and throw himself down because he got tired of waiting for mommy to do it with him. I was so excited when they offered an unlimited play pass for the summer months because I do NOT like to sweat. I do take the boys to the "Farmland" but there's a splash park there- we splash and play in the water, say hi to a goat or two, and then go get ice cream. Perfect. I'll go to the playground, sure. At 7 am or the spring or fall. Summer? No fricken' way. So this play pass was an excellent investment. Let the other suckers go sweat while I troll Pinterest for another decadent recipe. This morning it was madness. There was a birthday party at 8 am (ok, that's nuts- our birthday party is scheduled for 10 am and that still might be too early for some of our friends!!) and it was rainy. Thus, oodles of small children. And lots and lots of helicopter parents. I was still doing my sit on the couch routine but I kept having to go intervene- not because my kids couldn't do something, but because there was a real problem with turn taking going on up in that place. Yeah, kids have favorites. That's not justification for a kids taking 19 turns on the roller coaster (um, I counted- I could see it from my comfy chair) while there was an ever growing line of anxious, excited small ones. My small one was next in line, and after turn 12 or so, he finally just started crying. Not because he wasn't getting a turn- but because he couldn't figure out why the little kid on it didn't understand sharing. I felt HORRIBLE. Mr. M was just bereft with grief and I was about ready to rip that effing car out from under the roller coaster hog, when I noticed that his mother was a helicopter. Three feet away. "Good job buddy! Wahoo! Nice!" Um, how about "There is a line, your turn is done!". That stupid cow pretended to be completely oblivious to the kids, and now frustrated parents, waiting in line. I am (not) a patient person, but I couldn't stand it anymore. I sidled up to the mom and started with the gee isn't this a great activity talk, and she agreed. "My son only likes this, and it's why we come!".  I pointed out the line as her kid took his now 22nd turn, and she was unmoved. "But he's having such a good time!". That's when I decided to point out that it was great he was having fun by himself because he would never have friends if he didn't learn to share. Oh, and that she could buy him the same toy on Amazon for less than ten visits to the indoor playground. She said nothing, but got that stink face. And that's when I hightailed it to the damn roller coaster car when it rolled away from her kid and took it. Mr. M took his turn and promptly passed it to the next rider. Her kid threw a massive tantrum and they left. Heaven help me if they are from our town (which I don't think they are because I am pretty sure the moms at the (sweaty) local playground wouldn't tolerate that shit either). I recounted the story to a friend and they were very concerned that maybe the child had developmental issues, etc. OK, sure. However, pretty sure turn taking is one of those little life lessons we focus on teaching pretty early, even for kids with different learning challenges.

Bottom line? I'm a mama bear, and don't mess with my kid if he's playing fair!