Back, back again (minus yucky twerking)

Yeah, I didn't watch the VMA's, but apparently the Backstreet Boys did some whole reunion thing, so hence the "back, back again" reference. Apparently some Disney chick was grossly inappropriate in her twerking as well. That's ok. I actually had to google "VMA" when I saw it on my newsfeed. I felt like an idiot, but at least then I could recall what it was. Anyhoo, I digress. I haven't wanted to do anything- blog, paint, sew, craft, nor glitter. Nada. Nothing but cook with lots of onions, because then it's socially acceptable to bawl like a baby. Today, however, I felt an inkling of myself. We went to the infamous indoor playground where I always wind up with blog fodder. Today was no different. It's Labor Day- schools are closed, and we had roving thunderstorms plus 99% humidity. Um, yes. Give me indoor air conditioned play. I always get there at the ass crack when it's empty, so it was great. As it started to get crazy, there were lines for some popular attractions, like the massive blow up slide. NBD. Waiting for your turn is a good lesson for everyone (including the parents). There was a young man who ADORED the slide. He would get to the bottom and keep jumping there like it was a bounce house. Sorry buddy, that's ten feet to the left.  He wouldn't exit, but would try to bust back up the ladder to do it again. Sure, that's cool when you own the place, but with ten to twenty kids waiting, that doesn't work. The mom was right there- plus ten points for her (minus 100 for the twits sitting with headphones on ignoring their WAY too old children knocking over countless toddlers- it's cool they eventually got banished by the staff) but she was just smiling and motioning no with a wagging finger. I am sorry, if my kid is getting reprimanded by staff manning an attraction, and making countless sweating, miserable parents scowl even more, I would haul my fat ass up on the slide and pull him off. Turn taking SUCKS- but it's a life lesson. This wasn't like with a toy he wouldn't hand over either- every time he wouldn't vacate the bottom of the slide others were waiting, and some were put at risk by crashing into him as he would move but jump back directly into their path. I finally decided to try my "oh isn't it so hard teaching kids turn taking wise mama" commiseration with her. The first thing she said was, "My son has struggles. Waiting is so hard for him". Ok, I took the bait. (please note- I have done diagnostics in special education for more than ten years- if this kid had any diagnosis it was entitled syndrome- y'know, mom afraid of making a scene? If there was any serious question as to his abilities I NEVER would have said anything) I asked her what his diagnosis was. She said, "oh, he just struggles to wait for what he wants". My response- stone cold- "hunh, so he's four. Like every other kid here waiting his turn." It was probably a bit passive aggressive but seriously, I don't want to be the wake up call for this kid when he waltzes in MY classroom. Never mind the gaggle of children that were there with their one to one aids using alternative communication and struggling A LOT to wait their turn- sorry lady, no pity. Grow a pair and make him wait. NO ONE wants their kid to have a melt down in public, of course. Have I hauled one or more boys out of somewhere kicking and screaming? Oh hell yes I have. Did I get plenty of OHEMGEE DO WE NEED TO CALL DCF stares? Of course. Then there would be the few parents with the shadow clap.

Y'know- the "thanks for actually teaching your kids the world doesn't revolve around them" silent clap. That wink, that nod. OK fine, so maybe it's not usually the waiters responding like that- but the other parents, yeah, they get that. They're also more likely to bring out my leftovers when I drop them on the way.