More politics

I am still thinking about my post this morning on politics and I have a few more thoughts.

-If you are a woman and NOT voting with me, I have a serious question as to your true gender, and what decade you think we are living in.
-Hey teachers who I might work with? If you are NOT voting with me then are you saying you would like to double your class size? I can send you my kids if that's the issue.

Yeah, if you are going to vote for a big fat bully go for it. Don't freaking cry to me if your world gets rocked if enough fools are thinking like you.

Halloween Vomits

Halloween has puked on my entire life. It's a side effect from having Halloween being canceled last year due to the happenings of Snowtober- and then we had a freakin' Snowpocalypse. It was ugly, really ugly (for proof, read this) and Halloween was totally ruined. I was also incredibly pregnant and lazy- decorated NOTHING, made no costumes, and was a general failure as a mother and Halloween aficionado. I swore this year was going to be different- I would actually be prepared for my kid's birthday parties (so far I am one for one!!!), I would decorate, I would get the tree up for the holidays (oh and take down the garland and Christmas lights from LAST year), and bake. So far, I've been pretty on task. My house, car, classroom, and brain look like Halloween ate mass quantities of pumpkins, bats, ghosts, witches, and candy corn- and then upchucked. My children have not one, but TWO homemade Halloween hats- numerous shirts, socks, pajamas sporting pumpkins, and multiple costumes (only one of which I made by hand). I am currently running a sweatshop producing tutus as well. I taught myself to crochet hats just so that my children could have (im)perfect pumpkin hats. I can't size things well so it's like a pumpkin patch of hats- even Goldilocks could find one that fit. Instead of learning how to make the right size, I just kept making them until one fit everybody. Yeah, stay tuned for an etsy sale. I can see the listing now "Hideous Handmade Hats- One Size Fits Somebody Somewhere". That's going to head to regretsy RIGHT away! We have carved pumpkins, painted pumpkins, dropped pumpkins, eaten pumpkin cookies, cake, pie, seeds, coffee, and bread.

This morning the peppermint mocha made it's initial appearance at Dunkin. Thank God. I am pumpkin'ed out. Not sure what the hell I am going to do November 1st- maybe move on to Christmas?

F&^%$&*# Politics

This election is making me INSANE. I can't believe the idiots that actually walk among us and their skewed views. Let's be clear- if you don't agree with me YOU ARE JUST WRONG. Yup, I'm close minded. Yup, I am pro-choice, but not in major elections. There is ONE choice. My choice. If you are not going to agree with me then I don't really want to discuss politics with you at all because I will say insane things and lose my mind temporarily. I am not totally interested in losing people I like just because of their political leanings. Granted, I sort of want to have an intervention for them, but I don't know that TLC has come out with that show yet. I would totally watch it if they did. I have a few people that I would nominate for it too. I work with a few people that would be eligible for a political intervention and it's starting to get UGLY. November 7th has the potential to be ugly.

Thankfully, Canada is a lovely country, and if there are enough people that insist on being wrong, that's where you will find me.

Hiatus

So apparently my brain shuts down in early summer and just begins to re-emerge in October. Not really sure why, but it's as if the summer melts any drive I have to accomplish pretty much anything. My summer was great and there was plenty to write about (like the mystery of the missing Jane & Jack swimsuit- now that was a travesty) but did I? Nope. I say on the back deck and taught summer school and went to Cape May and other such pedantic summer offerings. There were highlights of course- Disney World, birthday parties galore, the best pulled pork EVER (yeah, that's you Greg!), and lots of naps! HA. I am totally kidding of course. There was no napping. Why would anyone ever think that?

Now you poor readers are in for it though- my brain is on over drive and I have plenty to say, not all of it entertaining or relevant!

Whoops

So I just realized that I haven't blogged in like, four million years. Summer has a way of getting me so off task. You'd think I could laze about eating bon bons and blogging, but no. I didn't even make it to the beach (by myself, with NO kids) once, which was my major goal of the summer. Sad, yes. I wish my toddler actually enjoyed the sand, but so far, it's a no go. Ironically when I pick him up at school I have to pry him out of the sandbox kicking and screaming.

Yes, I said school. Mr. M is a full fledged preschooler now, so I guess the toddler days are behind us. At some point maybe the toddler behavior will be behind us too? I mean, a girl can dream!!! His entrance into preschool has been pretty smooth, especially considering we moved J-Dog over to the same center so it's only one drop off in the morning. Mr. M loves it and begs to go to school, even on weekends! He adores his teacher Miss 'Nessa (Vanessa is apparently way too long a name for him) and likes to tell stories about her. Last night she lived in a castle with three frogs, a goat, and a cow. The castle was on top of horse mountain, and the chip truck came to bring Miss Nessa lunch. Yeah, he's not exactly Dr. Seuss- yet. Oh, and she was "sickwy" and turned all purple. It's those details that kill me. J-Dog seems to like his room too, and likes to crawl over to crying babies and pat their faces. Melt.

The thing that astonishes me the most? Getting the kids out of the house by 6:15 is actually EASIER than trying to get out at 7:15! I don't know what it is, but morning has been so smooth and I've been able to get coffee AND arrive at work on time at 7! This morning was a double turbo shot morning...insomnia is so not my friend.

Tanorexia

So there was recently that lady in the news who is being accused of taking her six year old into the tanning salon (her claim) or tanning booth (DCF's claim). Now this woman is orange in the worst- so disturbingly overly tan it actually hurts. Her kid looks pale as anything on the news, so I don't really know what went on there. However, this morning on the radio they were backing the mom and saying if she wants to take her kid tanning it's her call. I was FLARING. How is that ok in any stretch of the imagination? That's UNSAFE. Could be DEADLY. And then I remembered that my toddler eats chocolate ice cream regularly (sugar, cholesterol), candy off and on (eek- CORN SYRUP!) and has had sips of a diet coke (chemicals up the wazoo, and fake corn syrup); probably has eaten his fair share of dirt (neurotoxins, pollutants, arsenic, old lace, lord only knows!) and requests McDonald's by name. If we are going to say that this woman exposing her child to UV rays is wrong because they are dangerous, what about EVERY SINGLE OTHER PARENT ON THE PLANET? The ones who don't vaccinate are leaving their children open to potentially deadly diseases, but the ones who do could have a child with a reaction; the ones who use disposable diapers are killing the earth; but the ones who use cloth use lots of water; the ones who grow all their own fruits and vegetables in a hermetically sealed, pesticide free bubble probably have tractors that emit fumes that eat through the ozone layer, and the ones who grab whatever is on sale at the megamart could have a kid with a third eye. Pretty much everything we do is ruining someone's tomorrow, it's just the way it is.

Except napping in the sun and sipping sangria. I haven't found the flip side to that.

Vacation? What's that?

I like to be busy. A day where I have nothing planned is pretty annoying and I wake up irritated. Vacation is no different- when we go to Disney I want to DO stuff! I walk more at Disney then I probably do the entire rest of the year combined. By the time the 10 pm Spectro Magic parade starts, I'm  exhausted! It's worth it though. And yes, I take my two year old. He loves it. I figure he has the rest of his life to sleep. This past vacation week was no different, aside from the fact that daycare was closed. And hubby was at work, A LOT. And we now have TWO kids. So I stacked our schedule- no fewer than two events per day. We went to Davis Farmland- twice. The Mystic Aquarium, Il Forno, Dean Park- too many times to count. Swim class, playdates, shopping- I made sure we were BUSY. By Sunday evening I was completely exhausted, but it was well worth it. All three of us survived vacation, and actually enjoyed it!!!!! Going to work this morning was pretty amazing though- in the car by 6:40- coffee, ATM, and daycare by 7:10, work at 7:30. Ok, I was a bit late- 7:33.

You know what? My forty-plus high schoolers are way easier than my two munchkins. Apparently work has become mommy's vacation.